Weekend

OThis has been a wonderful week/end of family (blood and church) fun, revelation and optimism.

There are so many things that I commissioned to do and have been for a while but never felt adequate enough to do many, if not all, of them but I have finally voiced one of them to someone who has been commissioned to do something similar and it ties into the other thing that I have spoken to a wider group of people than I had initially.

I am going to pace myself as directed and do exactly as I am told to do and rejoice in all that comes with these two tasks even when they are difficult because I know that those things that you are called to do to honor Him are never done with ease because you will always have those out there that are jealous of your call and success, afraid of your call and success and afraid of the call on their own lives.

It was also a great weekend with my grand baby.  I took him to church and also took him to see a section of the family that has never met him before and they really enjoyed him.  

It amazes me that I love him just as much as if he were my very own.  No one could ever have described, accurately, to me how this feels to be a grandparent.  He is such a joy to be with and around and I love to see him smile.  Although I will admit he tried to give us the blues with his crying just because he wants to be walked like his father does for him but it was kind if cute all at the same time.

Well a new day has started and it's time for me to dive into it with gratitude for it.  Enjoy your lives...

Peace and blessings awesome people!

Every morning

every morning I wake up and thank God for another day, I thank Him for his Grace and Mercy in allowing me the blessing of another one because I am fully aware that I did not have to survive the night.

I wake up appreciative, positive and grateful.  I wake up knowing in my heart and soul that God has said to me that His work in me and my work for Him is not complete yet.  waking up any other way is not something that I can comprehend well, I just don't get how some people wake up and one of the first things out of their mouths is something negative.  how do they not know that it is a wonderful blessing to be here yet another day. 

something as small as a genuine compliment makes me smile or someone doing something for me because they feel that it would be a help to me to do it makes me appreciate them even more.  especially when I know they did it out of purity and just to help me because they see, hear or sense that I needed the help.  that to me is a beautiful thing and makes me happy.

someone asked me how I like my new apartment and I was about to say something negative in my answer but couldn't because the bottom line is that I really enjoy it, the view, the area, the beauty in His creation.  all of the things that I saw as negative are honestly not so negative because all of it works in His plan for me and my family.

lately I have not been getting enough rest, so I've been really tired, exhausted actually.  but I still have to get up every morning and do what I have to do; go to work, come home and take care of my family, go to church and socialize from time to time.  I have quite the commute every day too and from work and I've had a couple of near misses where the end result could have been tragic but God has protected me each way each day.  so every morning when I wake up I am grateful.  death is all around me, family, friends and acquaintances dying some suddenly and some from prolonged illnesses.  life is short and the next year, month, day or minute is not promised so I have to be thankful when He keeps me another day. 

if you don't wake up every morning thanking God for another day then you need to question a few things; your relationship with God, who you are in Him and who He is in you and who you are as a person that you can find no good in the first opening of your eyes, in the first 30 minutes of your day.  in that asking also dig into how you were raised/programmed as a child because as much as you hate to admit it your upbringing has so much to do with your current.

every morning when I wake up I thank God!

peace and blessings wonderfully awesome people!

appreciating the journey

I was talking to a brother who was speaking of another brother who has a terminal illness, the doctors can not fix nor can he do anything to ease it.  we were talking about appreciating the journey, in so many words.  he is discouraged because of the things that he used to be able to do but can no longer do because of this illness.  something as simple as snapping his fingers is no longer possible.  walking in a straight line is no longer possible.  this first brother told the second one to remember the things you used to do with pleasure because those memories were good but don't dwell on what you can no longer do because of your present condition.  embrace it, appreciate it and live your life in spite of the illness, enjoy your life and family in spite of.  evaluate and move on.

everything that you have ever been through in life, whether good or bad has gotten you to the point you are at right now.  if you look at it the right way you can say to yourself and others, ok this happened and that happened but had I not gone through all of that I wouldn't be right here and now.  I like it for what it is but i'm not satisfied because I know there is more so let me start the next phase of the journey.  you get to the next level and you appreciate the journey because you looked at it the right way, you understand some things better, the mistakes or choices in general you made help you to see things clearer.

you know when you're in the mall and the directory has a map with a sign that says "you are here", every once in a while it's good to look at the path you took to get to "here" so you know where you came from and to help you appreciate the view.  you go further into the mall and you're looking for a particular store and you get a little lost along the way, you come across another directory that has a map that says "you are here" and you look at the path again and say ok, I made this turn, went straight here, made that turn and along there I didn't come across what I needed to but where I am isn't so bad.  ok but now to get where I need to be I have to go this way because now I know where I came from and I don't want to go back there. now I know where I am and I can't stay.

you finally make it to your "destination", which for me is wherever God called me to be and I can look at it and say I truly appreciate all that I went through, good or bad because it all got me to this point.  think about it, if you had taken another path, would it have lead you to this very point?  yes or no?  something to think about right?  well I say yes because what He has for you is yours regardless to the path however, the path you take determines how long it takes you to get there to that particular point and your understanding the path or looking at it in the right way, helps you to appreciate more the end point.

your destiny is in your hands, how you get there is up to you and if you appreciate the journey it will help you better appreciate the destiny.

peace and blessings awesome people!

jai ar

your destiny is calling

as I began my journey to get to know God better I began to see a lot more clearly what it is that He wants me to do in this life, I began to see what He has in store for me.  along that journey, seeing those things and knowing what I know I began to pull back from my connection to Him not even realizing that that is what I was doing.

there were/are certain things that I was directed in the Spirit to do and I chose not to do them.  however, it didn't look at the moment as if I had chosen not to do them, it appeared to me initially as if things had gotten in the way and stopped me or blocked me from doing them.  going through financial strains, having family issues, not being happy in my job and not having any luck in finding another one, getting married and focusing on the new marriage and husband, dealing with the fall out of children trying to adjust to having a man in the house.  everything under the sun is to blame for me not doing what I clearly heard Him say do, that is until I actually sat and analyzed and reconnected and that is when I figured out that I had put on hold everything that I was called to do because I had a fear or distrust maybe in what it would turn out to be.  I had even convinced myself that because I was not ready to do those things that He was not ready for me to do them.  someone asked me just a week or so ago if I knew my purpose and I told them yes.  he said you really know what it is that God has called you to do it and you aren't doing it, why not?

it wasn't a fear or distrust in God, it was a fear/distrust in my being able to do what it is that he told me to do.  but why did i have that fear knowing full well that anything that He has called me to do He will help me do.  if I do what i'm supposed to do He will do what I can not do.  as I began to meditate more and talk more about certain things it was clear to me that I needed to get back on track for me to fulfill my destiny not just for myself or my family but for my God.  how do I feel when my children don't do something that I have clearly told them to do or they do it half way right?  I feel betrayed, hurt, disappointed and that's how I imagine God must feel knowing that He told me what to do and I clearly heard it but I only did some of it half way right and didn't do some of it at all.

time to get back on track people, time to focus.  what are you being called to do that you are not doing?  what do you clearly hear but are ignoring?  get in motion people and fulfill your destiny!

peace and blessings God's people,

jai ar

circle of life

the world is round, a circle.  it is cyclical, it's a cycle, it recycles.  it has a boomerang effect.  meaning what you put out there is what you get back.

stop thinking that your actions or words have no effect  on people places or things.  stop behaving as if there is no force behind them.  just as the Creator said "my words shall not return unto me void", meaning it will not come back to him empty, there is some force, power behind them.

people forget that what they put out is what they get back, you put ill words and will out towards others, you knock others down and belittle them, this is what comes back to you ten fold and the same with the positive.  here's the kicker though, people seem to think that if they don't receive the punishment within their time reame that it won't happen at all.

let me further assist; just because you don't see it in the frame of time you have doesn't mean it won't happen.  just because you don't see it in your life directly doesn't mean it didn't happen, sins of the father shall fall upon the son.  what you do or say not only affects you but it affects those around you.

negative example: you lie about something to someone and think nothing of it to save your butt, that person takes the lie you fed them and feeds it to someone else thinking that it's truth and behaves accordingly.  what you have said in falsehood could cause someone to become incarcerated, injured, fired, expelled, killed, etc.  but all you did was tell a lie to cover your own behind and keep out of trouble.

another one: you sell drugs and live an unsavory life or you're an undercover prostitute.  someone that you've done a dirty deal with and they didn't appreciate it, sees a family member of yours or a good friend that has absolutely nothing to do with your chosen lifestyle but because they are connected to you they are fair game.  the wounded party takes their unhappiness out on that family member or friend.

positive example: you say a simple hello to someone, treat them with kindness.  they find out about an opportunity that it seems you would absolutely fit in and tell you about it.  the opportunity is just what you were asking/looking for and it helps you achieve a goal that you'd always wanted to achieve and all you did was treat someone with kindness.

another one: you continuously give to others despite not having much yourself but it's what you do, you have the gift of helps.  someone takes notice to that and somehow finds out that you need assistance; a new car, month's rent, bills paid, bus fare, whatever and they an abundance that they want to share with you so they do simply because that's all they've seen you do is help others and remain positive.

whether you want to believe it or not what you put out into the universe comes back to you one way or another so be careful what you do and say because you never know who may be watching.

peace and blessings awesome people!

jai ar

Peace in the midst of

the last few weeks have been so busy for me and I've had a lot of thoughts running through my mind.  so many that if I put them all here it would probably look like jai babble, lol.

one of the things that I have learned over the years is that I am in control of my reactions to people and things.  as a mature adult and a child of the King it is more and more evident to me that I have put that lesson into practice a lot more than I initially realized. 

my spirit has always been one of peace, calm and tranquility so when I come up against something that is trying to pull me away from that I usually don't have to dig too deep to pull myself back together.  however there are times when I have to go deep for my center again because something has just truly rocked me.

one of the most important things that helps me stay centered is prayer.  I believe when you make that connection with the Higher Power (for me it's God) that you can't help but feel better.  another important way to stay centered is meditation.  some wonder about meditation because it seems so difficult to do especially when you have a lot going on but if you just sit for 5 minutes at a time, quietly it will happen.  initially it may be difficult because your mind is racing with one thing after the other but if you breath deeply and consistently you begin to clear your mind one minute at a time and before you know it there is nothing but darkness and peace.  you extend that 5 minutes from 5 to 7 to 10 and before you know it you are capable of meditating for 30 minutes at a time and being at peace.

one more thing that helps me stay centered, that I absolutely have to get back to, is exercise.  you don't have to do anything difficult or too strenuous.  I like walking, yoga and pilates.  all of these things help me clear my head and become one with nature, myself, God and keep me centered.  the adrenaline rush is amazing and lasts for a long time.

get in the practice of praying, meditating and exercising and when things begin to go wrong you will be strong enough to deal with them.

Peace and Blessings wonderful people,
jai ar

unforgiveness

I was listening to my usual radio program the other morning and the conversation turned to a particular gospel artist and him putting his personal, yet unpleasant, business out in social media and at the same time pulled a few other people in on there with him.  In this self exposing matter, after he’d basically called the other parties liars he then proceeded to say that he had forgiven them but the hosts of the show questioned the sincerity of that forgiveness.

It brought me to thinking more and more about forgiveness, or the lack thereof, and I came to two specific thoughts:

Unforgiveness has many reasons; one is that we have not been taught (shown) what it is.  But I think the other is; we tend to see that act that we cannot forgive in ourselves.

A lot of times when you are not able to forgive the person that has wronged you it may be because you see some of that wrong doing in you.  You see that it is either something that you have done and you feel guilty about and now that thing has been thrown in your face and the other person may not have had any idea what they have done or because you see in you the potential to do the same thing to another person but you are not happy about that fact that you are capable of being just as wrong because you see yourself as a “good person”.  Ex: if you cannot forgive your mate for going outside to get intimacy, and it doesn’t have to be physical, it could be because you are guilty of the same.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not condone infidelity but sometimes a person steps out of the partnership for a connection that they either never got from you or can no longer get from you no matter what they do to get it.  They did everything you like but you no longer have the interest or time to pay attention to them and give them that connection.  You blame them for the failure of your partnership and refuse to forgive them and all the while you are doing the very thing you refuse to forgive them for or you at least thought of doing, you wanted to do it, maybe even planned to do but didn’t act on it.  The guilty will persecute…think about it.

With all of the things that happened to me along this journey called life the only way I was able to get through it was to believe in a higher power (God, Jesus), pray to that higher power, ask for forgiveness and the power/ability to forgive myself and others.  No matter how much I’d thought I’d gotten over things the more it was put in my face in various ways, not always exactly as it happened but similar, the more I began to realize that I had not truly forgiven those things that had happened to me, myself for “letting” them happen and the people that had done those things.  But as I began to mature in myself and in my walk with God I began to learn to forgive and live in peace.  I don’t let people have that much control over my life anymore.   

I’m sitting there talking about what they did to me, thinking about how it hurt me and what I can do to get back at them and the whole while they are moving on with their lives no longer thinking about how they hurt me, no longer looking for forgiveness because in their heads and hearts, it’s done and over and if I can’t forgive them oh well.

Don’t hold on to grudges, that hurt, pain, unforgiveness, dislike, mistrust turns into hate and all of those things eat you alive and your health fails, your mind fails, your prosperity fails, your happiness fails and you cannot live in your purpose.  You may look, on occasion, happy and carefree but the whole while you are aching on the inside, falling apart on the inside.

Sit down and really think about it; why are you not forgiving that person honestly?  Is it really about what they did or didn’t do to you or is it more about what you may or may not have done to others or what may or may not have gone the way you wanted in your life.

You cannot truly forgive others until you have truly forgiven yourself.  Until you have forgiven yourself for what you have done in your past and who you used to be and asked the Creator for forgiveness you cannot truly forgive others.

Peace and blessings awesome people!

Jai Ar